


Scars to Your Beautiful

by AngelWithAStory



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Body Worship, Drabble, F/F, Implied/Referenced Torture, Intimacy, Mutual Pining, Non-Explicit Sex, Scars, Sharing a Bed, Touching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 18:44:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8764699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelWithAStory/pseuds/AngelWithAStory
Summary: When they were simply adventurers, they didn’t touch much.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I tried my hand at writing something above a teen rating for once ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Title from Scars to Your Beautiful by Alessia Cara

When they were simply adventurers, they didn’t touch much.

When they were younger and trying to figure out the world while simultaneously thinking they knew all they needed to, Allura and Kima didn’t touch much.

Of course, there were the healing touches. Kima clasping her shoulder as Allura’s wounds sealed on their own. Allura gently tilting Kima’s head back as she poured the potion down her unconscious friend’s throat.

The gentle knock of shoulders. The small attention-getting taps on the arm. The slight brushes when weapons or spell components were passed back and forth.

It wasn’t until Thordak reared his ugly head that they began to touch in earnest.

Holding each other in the dead of night when the world became all too much and began to crash down around them. Gripping the other’s hand when their skin shook so much they couldn’t cast. Kissing until their heartbeats became drums in their chests. Palms across skin under clothes as they both gave into base desires _just this once_ , _only this once_.

Allura could recall the marks on Kima’s arms and legs like a cantrip.

Kima could recite all the places Allura liked to be touched and how much pressure to place like a holy oath.

Allura memorised the cacophony of noises Kima made for her ( _only her; only when they were together behind locked doors; only when Allura whispered sweet nothings in her ear and held her close_.)

Kima knew how to make Allura sing with barely a twitch of her wrist, if she so wanted.

 

When Thordak was sealed away, and branching roads were rolled out like carpet before them, they made a vow to themselves. Lying in each other’s arms for the last time, they vowed to themselves that they would not let themselves fall together anymore. No more nights spent sharing a bed, no more frantic or loving kisses, no more foreheads resting together.  

The vow carried them fifteen years.

Brief visits, lingering hugs, _what if_ s lurking in the back of their minds, eyes flickering to lips and pretending not to notice.

Those years were long and they took their toll.

Those years were unkind and they managed best they could.

Kima fought the good fight and spread the word of Bahamut to anyone who needed it.

Allura researched and lived in her tower and spoke with the Sovereign Uriel when the council was in session.

They both pretended that their lives were as they expected them to turn out and that they were happy.

If only the world hadn’t ended, then maybe they could have kept it up forever.

 

Whitestone was _cold_ , but there was a beauty about it that only the cold could bring out.

It was the perfect weather to force people to stay indoors and preferably still under the covers.

Kima was no exception to this.

 

Kima hadn’t even hesitated when Allura arrived in Whitestone and Cassandra was deciding on accommodation. There weren’t that many spare rooms in the castle (though  Drake was fine to take one just to stay close to the warmth of the building) and Kima was already holed up in a house near Shaun’s on the estate.

It made sense. Allura and Shaun were both working on the creepy Ziggurat underneath the castle. Kima kept herself busy tending to Shaun and just generally getting to know him. It made sense that they would stay fairly close together. Save space, and all of that.

(Kima would never admit to how her heart jumped when Allura agreed.)

The first night was almost awkward.

There was a second bedroom that Allura was using, but eating together and passing each other in the corridor had enough electricity in the air to make them think twice about which side of the hallway they walked down

The first night was almost too much to bear, knowing that there was only a wall separating them.

The second night was less so.

Yes, it was still awkward acting as they did nearly two decades ago.

But Kima heard a tiny knock on her door when she lay awake and invited Allura in.

“We haven’t had a chance to talk yet,” Allura had said, her nightwear and dressing gown prim and proper, “about everything that’s happened.”

“To the world or between us?” Kima had asked, her tattered and stained shirt and pants that she slept in feeling shabby compared to her.

“Both, I suppose.”

They broke their vow that night.

 

“I had no idea they did this to you, Kima.” Allura’s voice was quiet.

Her fingers trailed over Kima’s skin, following the raised scars. They cast a pattern across her tanned complexion. An ancient tale of a woman stronger than anyone could expect. Of a survivor who found her way back home with the help of eight misfits.

A shiver echoed under Allura’s fingerprints as she let herself explore. A thin sheen of sweat from their exertion coated both of them, but if either gave a damn, then they never voiced it.

“You should see the other guy.” Kima grinned down at her, her hair loose and falling in a curtain around them.

Allura frowned as her palms slipped over a deep gash encircling Kima’s muscled torso and spiraling down her thigh. It felt jagged and newly healed, the skin slightly taut around it. So Allura moved gently. Tracing the curve of her muscle with the delicacy of a spell being cast.

(Kima remembered in vivid detail the torture chamber: the smell of blood infecting her nostrils, the bite of each instrument as it tore her skin and clawed at her secrets, the strain in her muscles and sting in her chest when she was left abandoned for hours at a time.)

(Kima thought about Allura’s touch and let her chest stop aching.)

Her index finger ran over an old scar along the back of her knee that Allura remembered tending to. A stray crossbow bolt that barely missed the bone.

Kima’s hand gently wrapped around Allura’s wrists and began to guide them.

Back up her legs, running smoothly over the skin and scars intermingled to make the tapestry of _her_. Back over her stretch marked hips and up along her stomach. Past her breasts, clinging to shoulders.  

Allura held Kima’s head in her hands and pulled her down for another kiss. Her mind yearned for sleep, but _nothing_ could keep her from making up for lost years. _Nothing_ could stop her from letting Kima know just how much she missed her.

The kiss drew on, slow and lazy. Kima let her smaller frame settle onto Allura’s naked chest, rough hands smoothly sliding down her sides. There were small marks that Kima couldn’t remember along Allura’s waist and arms.

The kiss was broken and Kima blinked in surprise when she saw the sorrowful look on Allura’s face.

“What?” Kima’s voice was the brand of soft that she rarely used around other people. “Do you want to talk about it?” They both knew better than to push for answers they couldn’t give.

“I was attacked, just over a year ago.” Allura said, letting her head fall back on the pillows. Kima tried to ignore the feeling in her chest. “It appeared in my tower when I was busy reviewing some documents. A shadow demon. I managed to banish it, but I didn’t have enough power in me to heal myself right away. So now I have the scars to prove it.”

They were quiet for a moment, both of them just drinking in the _contact_. The skin on skin. The fingertips against scar tissue. The hair tickling collarbones. The foot lazily tapping against the mattress.

(Allura tried not to think about the whispers in her head: that night when her own home wasn’t safe, when her defences were down and she paid the price, when she realised that the fight in her veins had never really left but had festered until it rusted her instincts.)

(Allura forced herself to focus on the small circles Kima was drawing on her hip and let her mind go blank.)

Kima shifted and let her arms curl around Allura’s soft waist, hugging her tightly. Hands ran through her hair as Kima listened to the heartbeat by her ear. She could feel the remainder of the burns that she knew ran all down Allura’s back. Fifteen years old and still a very vivid reminder.

“I missed this.” Kima whispered, muttering the words to the skin between Allura’s breasts. She tried to not bang her chin when Allura’s laughter shook her head slightly.

“The sex?”

“ _You_.” Kima propped herself up enough to look Allura in the eye. “I missed you, you beautiful, smart, brave bookworm.”

The old and well-worn insult could only make Allura smile and she sat up, wrapping her arms loosely around Kima’s shoulders. Kima frowned for moment, looking at how frustratingly _put-together_ Allura looked. It was almost insulting.

“What?” Allura said, drawing back ever so slightly.

“How is your hair still so perfect?!” Kima huffed and sat back on Allura’s lap. “We’re going to have to do something to fix this.”

“Please do.” Allura said. She let Kima take the lead as they both broke their vow for good.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm [queenmoggy](http://queenmoggy.tumblr.com/) on tumblr if you want to critique me on my absolute lack of knowledge on anything sexual  
> This fic? you mean _who keeps letting the 17 asexual virgin try to write sexy things holy fuck_
> 
> AKA I am still not over the kimallura kiss and suffering because of it
> 
> AKA it's been a long time since I tried to write naked intimacy so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ here you go


End file.
